Three Penis Liquor gives your doodle the vitality of seal, deer and dog

Three Penis Liquor

Three Penis Liquor – the aftertaste we’ve all been waiting for

Before you get judge-y about Three Penis Liquor, remember that there are large swathes of people who find singular joy in eating strange and dangerous things to see what happens, then posting the video evidence on YouTube had a slow year in 2013. It only took 37,936 videos of idiots eating and barfing up Carolina Reaper Peppers before the novelty lost its luster, and the demographic has been adrift ever since while looking for the next disgusting, agonizing thing to do to themselves.

Which bring us to “Tezhi Sanbian Jiu,” aka Three Penis Liquor, rice wine that has been brewed with the one flavor all true macho men want lingering in their mouths for hours: seal penis, deer penis and Cantonese dog penis.

As with most weird shit that comes out of China, the drink purports to provide men with a surge of vitality impossible to get in any other way – except of course exercise, eating well and getting enough sleep, but that’s not quite exotic and crazy enough for most real men.

No word on what it does to women, but I don’t think I wanna be around to find out.

Three Penis Liquor is allegedly sold in supermarkets across Shanghai. So, who’s gonna be a man and test it?