So as a few of you may have noticed, last week I went straight from being cloistered in my condo like a masturbating food critic to a balls-out invasion of NYC. Oh man, it was crazy. The parties, the half-naked flirting celebrities, people throwing money at me, it was completely…

Hello from New York City. I’m having a fantastically productive and enjoyable time trying to make the word a better place through literary genius and drinking excessive quantities of wine. I’m about eight working hours away from being done with the Romania and Moldova guidebook project that I’ve been picking…

My hostel roommate the other night, an Aussie on a round-the-world tour, informed me that he’d run across ‘several of your lot’, meaning guidebook writers, in the mere two months he’d been traveling so far. Indeed, if you’ve ever spent serious time on the road in spring or summer you…

Tomorrow I fly back to Romania for the second time in three months like a jet-setting badass to complete my LP guidebook research, wallow in the fame of being a travel writing all-star, beat off amorous groupies with my medical burro riding crop and sleep soundly every night with the…

Love mail is great and all, especially when it goes into exquisite detail about all the ways that you rule, but hate mail can sometimes be even better. If you receive hate mail on a regular basis, you’ve truly made it. Over the past few years, I’ve become a household…

I just wanted to remind everyone that I own that book title for all eternity, even if the universe collapses in on itself and I never get a deal for my memoirs, so don’t even try to lift it. And yes, “Lamborghinis and Blowjobs” is too close. I was thinking…

Bucharest was pretty dreadful, but I’ve had worse. Naples comes to mind – and that hellhole Andorra la Vella. Or that time in Los Angeles, when I drove from UCLA to Orange County… Nevertheless, I won’t be buying property in Bucharest soon or even investing in a 10-ride metro card….

Actually, I don’t really have anything else to say to you guys. I board a flight in just over 24 hours and as soon as I touch the ground in Bucharest, I’ll be a blur of over-Red Bulled, under-rested, stress-addled, bilingual jabbering motion for the next four weeks. I could…

For f*cks sake. What is it lately with idiots in travel media happily volunteering details about their enthusiastic drug use? First the most short-sighted travel writer in the history of the world – since the guy that moblogged the Crusades – regaled us with how he used/traded/sold drugs during his…

I bet you all clicked over here expecting biblical raving about what everyone else is raving about right now in the form of a “This is what’s pissing me off today” to end all “This is what’s pissing me off todays”. Well, you’re not getting it. There’s just no point….