Love mail is great and all, especially when it goes into exquisite detail about all the ways that you rule, but hate mail can sometimes be even better. If you receive hate mail on a regular basis, you’ve truly made it. Over the past few years, I’ve become a household…

I’m a disaster of aches, pains and ominous symptoms lately. I’ve always been a passionate hypochondriac, but this is starting to get ridiculous. And it all started almost overnight. Well, over-month, but still a relatively short period of time. As of the time of writing, I’ve got two painful teeth…

I just wanted to remind everyone that I own that book title for all eternity, even if the universe collapses in on itself and I never get a deal for my memoirs, so don’t even try to lift it. And yes, “Lamborghinis and Blowjobs” is too close. I was thinking…

Though my Romania research is only a little more than half completed (I return July 9th for three more weeks on the road), I’m long overdue for a positive post about this country just to pacify those of you that are undoubtedly wondering why I keep coming here. Lists are…

The dwindling elbow room on my shit list got a lot tighter last week when about a dozen members of Romania’s so-called “news media” pissed me off so much that I didn’t even need Novocain when they drilled out my cavity later that day. I had no idea what a…